A Time to Remember

A year ago today, I was curled up in a ball laying on my bed crying. I had just broken up with someone and I was so angry at my dad. I was 4 days away from beginning one of the greatest journeys of my life and all I could think about was how I couldn't wait to get away from everything.

It has been exactly one year since I've been in a relationship and I can honestly say it has been the best year out of the 23 I've been blessed with. It has been a year of growth, a year of struggles, a year of brokenness and healing. I saw God in a way that I never had before. I had always said I didn't need a man by side, but over the past year I've come to actually believe it and live that out. Starting with Journey, I saw the Lord place a shield around my (at the time) broken heart. He allowed me to see what it mean to let Him guard my heart, and then He taught me how to guard it myself. He brought me 11 men as a part of my team and allowed me to witness what it means to have a true brother in Christ. A brother who is interested in your walk with Christ and not just when he can take you on a date. I've had guy friends all my life. But I'd never had a guy friend that treated me the way Christ calls us to treat each other - as sons and daughters of the most high God.

I was able to watch one member of my team pursue his girlfriend, now fiance, in the way he handled his relationships with all the girls. It was a beautiful and tangible example of what I deserve and of how Christ constantly pursues me. I was allowed to let go, to truly live, to love again the way I was created to love. Christ set me back on my feet and simply said, "walk." So I did.

This past year I have walked in more freedom than I ever knew possible. I've learned so much about Jesus and His love for me. I have learned what it means to rest in His love. I've experienced His correction and His discipline. And, I've been romanced by the one man that deems me worthy of dying for.

This year, God has showed me just how faithful He is in everything that He does. He is a promise maker and a promise keeper. He has called me out of my comfort zone and into a life where I don't know what's next. But, I've never been more ok with that than I am right now.

Tomorrow, I leave again for a place that is more like home than I could've ever dreamed of. I leave with a healed heart; a heart full of hope and promise. I walk forward with confidence that His plans and timing are so sovereign. I march on knowing that my life rests in the palm of His hand and not in mine. For that, I am so thankful.