All the Way

"All the way my Savior leads me."

We just arrived back from community one and the Lord's faithfulness abounds. I knew that God had me on a different journey than last summer, but I wasn't aware of just how different it would look. It has been a beautiful challenge walking with these ladies as their leader but also walking along side of them as a part of journey.

While in the community, I was able to see God - once again - in a way I've never seen him before. As a lot of you know, I'm a creative person. I enjoy art and the creative process, but I also am an avid lover of photography. When it comes to taking my own photos, I'm am very insecure and struggle with feeling inadequate. But, during the 6 days in the community, the Lord pressed in to me that I am not made perfect in the things I do - but in the way He has made me.

For the first few days of Journey, I was hesitant to even take out my camera because as part of our staff, we have an amazing photographer, Johnny McLaughlin, who God has blessed with an incredible talent. But, God has been faithful to use Johnny in a huge way in my life. He has had the patience to sit down with me and teach me so many things about photography and just reassure me that it is ok to mess up. For so long I was feeling guilty because my dad bought me all this new camera stuff specifically for Kenya and I didn't even want to use it. But, through Johnny and Kadie, God showed me that just like He blesses me because I'm His child, so does my earthly father. He didn't buy me these things because he expects perfection, but because he wants me to experience joy and because he loves me. The same way, God doesn't bless me with things because He expects perfection, but because He loves me and wants me to have joy.



All throughout the week I was able to see what it truly means to be a leader. As a summer staff, we have been extremely blessed with Cody as our leader. I've been able to watch him and learn from him as he pushes us to step further into our roles. Today, Cody left with Nathanael to do some work and summer staff was left to lead on our own. I was honestly really nervous to not have him here but as the day winds down, I am so thankful that we have had this opportunity. Before leaving, he looked us in the eyes and said he trusts us and is confident in Jesus in us to lead these interns. Today was such a sweet time with the interns as they had a sabbath and as we were able to lead them in a debrief discussion of what they experienced in the first community. The Lord showed me continually that He truly has equipped me for what He has called me to. I was able to step up and into the role that has been given to me for the summer and I am confident that I will continue to grow from here.

His goodness is steadfast and everlasting. It endures forever and I can't even imagine what is in store for me during the rest of the summer and when I return home. As I walk along side of these interns I am reminded daily that I am on a journey as well. I see Jesus in all of them on a daily basis and am so thankful that the Lord purposed all of us to be together for this summer. It is such a sweet time that not a lot of people get to have in their lives.

This past week was a beautiful reminder of just how big God is. As I stepped off the bus, I was greeted by dear friends who were not aware that I was returning. Their excitement and joy was a direct reflection of God's excitement and joy when we choose to return to Him daily. I am so thankful that He has allowed me to come back for this summer and strengthen not only my relationship with the people of Kenya, but also my relationship with Him. His love is sweet and so so wild.

Thank you all for your prayers. Please keep them coming as we gear up to head into our next community Tuesday morning.

This is the Day

Today is the day.

We head to the airport in just 7 hours and will be on our way to Kenya. I have waited for this moment since August. I knew I would be returning to Kenya. While I didn't know it what capacity it would be in, I was confident nonetheless. And I am so full of joy that it is with Choose to Invest and the Journey 2013 interns.

This past week at Camp Highland I got to watch the Lord move in so many ways. He is actively setting this group free from things that have held them captive for years. It is a beautiful sight and I am full of anticipation for what He is going to do.

They have started to share their stories with each other and it is humbling and incredible to see how the Lord has knit this team together so intentionally. I cannot wait to walk along side of them as they continue to go deeper with God and with each other over the next 9 weeks.

As I look back to where I was a year ago at this time, all I can see is God's faithfulness. The past two years have been nothing but walking through brokenness. When I arrived in Atlanta for J2013, I felt nothing but peace. I have already wrestled through what it looks like to not be broken. I've learned that I don't have to be broken for God to teach me things. I've learned it's ok to be confident in His calling. I've learned that you can become just as numb to brokenness as you can to seasons of peace.

I am happy to just be with Him; to just walk with Him knowing that He is leading me and will let me know which direction to head in. I'm excited to walk the streets of Kenya once again. I'm filled with joy to be with these beautiful people. And I'm fully expectant of all that He has planned for this team.

Whatever comes our way, to God be the glory. Forever and ever. Amen.

In the Beginning

Journey 2013 has officially begun.

As I sit and listen to my fellow teammates teach these interns, I am reminded of where I was a year ago. I think it is so vital that we always take time to remember where we were in order to see how far God has brought us. I am so excited to see where these interns are now and to know that by the end of the summer none of them will be who they are today sitting in this room.

As we dive into the curriculum and God's word, please join me in prayer over these precious people. Pray that they will have open hearts, open ears, and open eyes to see God for who He is and all that He wants to do in their life. Pray that they will be united as a team; that they will learn who they truly are in Christ. Pray that there will be awakening within each individual to who God really is in light of where they've come from. Pray for freedom. Pray for release. Pray for brokenness. Pray for healing. Pray for passion. Pray for boldness. Pray for growth. Pray for transformation.

I cannot wait to let you all in on the Journey as it unfolds before us. Thank you for your continued prayers and all of your support!

A Time to Remember

A year ago today, I was curled up in a ball laying on my bed crying. I had just broken up with someone and I was so angry at my dad. I was 4 days away from beginning one of the greatest journeys of my life and all I could think about was how I couldn't wait to get away from everything.

It has been exactly one year since I've been in a relationship and I can honestly say it has been the best year out of the 23 I've been blessed with. It has been a year of growth, a year of struggles, a year of brokenness and healing. I saw God in a way that I never had before. I had always said I didn't need a man by side, but over the past year I've come to actually believe it and live that out. Starting with Journey, I saw the Lord place a shield around my (at the time) broken heart. He allowed me to see what it mean to let Him guard my heart, and then He taught me how to guard it myself. He brought me 11 men as a part of my team and allowed me to witness what it means to have a true brother in Christ. A brother who is interested in your walk with Christ and not just when he can take you on a date. I've had guy friends all my life. But I'd never had a guy friend that treated me the way Christ calls us to treat each other - as sons and daughters of the most high God.

I was able to watch one member of my team pursue his girlfriend, now fiance, in the way he handled his relationships with all the girls. It was a beautiful and tangible example of what I deserve and of how Christ constantly pursues me. I was allowed to let go, to truly live, to love again the way I was created to love. Christ set me back on my feet and simply said, "walk." So I did.

This past year I have walked in more freedom than I ever knew possible. I've learned so much about Jesus and His love for me. I have learned what it means to rest in His love. I've experienced His correction and His discipline. And, I've been romanced by the one man that deems me worthy of dying for.

This year, God has showed me just how faithful He is in everything that He does. He is a promise maker and a promise keeper. He has called me out of my comfort zone and into a life where I don't know what's next. But, I've never been more ok with that than I am right now.

Tomorrow, I leave again for a place that is more like home than I could've ever dreamed of. I leave with a healed heart; a heart full of hope and promise. I walk forward with confidence that His plans and timing are so sovereign. I march on knowing that my life rests in the palm of His hand and not in mine. For that, I am so thankful.

In the Eye of the Elephant

I have always wondered and people have often asked me where my love of elephants comes from. For the longest time I had no response. But, after learning about them extensively and reading stories about (and falling in love with) the girls at The Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee, I think I've found an answer - or part of one at least.

They say that elephants never forget. I've read stories and watched countless videos of elephants reuniting with old family members that they were separated from. I've watched them mourn the loss of loved ones much like humans do. I've read about and have witnessed them remembering. But, I've also watched them forgive. I've watched them learn to trust people again. I've seen them open up to other elephants that have never been a part of their herd. I've watched them find joy and freedom despite the abuse and pain they experienced in the past.

These beautiful animals may not have souls (despite my desperate prayers), but my Savior and Creator shines through them and deeply touches mine. My heart is drawn to them and to any normal person, my love for them may seem irrational. But that's just it. Christ's love for us is irrational. It doesn't make sense and as much as we try, we'll never be able to explain it. It simply has to be experienced. And even then, it is only just a glimpse of what is to come.

When I look at an elephant, she's not just a massive gray creature. I see a masterpiece that only knows joy. I see a beauty that walks in freedom because the chains of her past have literally been cut from her ankles. I see scars that tell a story of rescue and redemption. I see eyes that are no longer worried about tomorrow. I see my Savior. And, I see in them who He wants me to be: a girl that knows no worry, that celebrates the smallest of joys, a daughter that embraces the freedom I've been set apart for, a child that loves with reckless abandon.

If for no other reason, these lovely works of my Creator were meant to be reminders to me of how deeply I am loved. I am continually blown away by the ways God chooses to romance me, teach me, and lavish His love on me.

I will get my moment with an elephant. And it will be magical. To look into her eyes and see into the heart of my Maker.

And Still, I Must Walk

If you know me at all, you know I do things with a passion. I speak with a passion. I write with a passion. I love with a passion. I live with a passion. But sometimes, I can feel that passion fading. I can feel the enemy sneaking in and telling me I'm not good enough or that I have to conform to the world I live in.

Over the past month at church, we were talking about Joseph and the pit he was in. We talked about what he learned while he was there and how God used that time to prepare him for what was coming. Joseph waited for God to pull him out of the pit. The pit was empty and void of water. (Genesis 37:24). Much like Joseph, I've been in my own pit since August. I just didn't recognize it for what it was.

Joseph's pit was a literal hole in the ground while mine was something different: school. Something inside of me has been telling me this isn't where I'm supposed to be anymore but I was fighting it. School has been hell for me and I haven't been able to live a full life confined within the walls that are holding me in. I've been waiting for the Lord, like Joseph, to just pull me out. But He had other plans in mind.

This summer, we had to pick one word that we thought God was teaching us. At first I thought my word was "wait", but I soon realized it was actually "walk". We walked all over the beautiful country of Kenya and I grew to prefer that over the bus rides. God constantly whispered in my ear that all He was asking me to do was walk with Him. He asked me in Kenya, and He's asked me again - while I was in my pit.

Like this summer, I thought He was asking me to wait - and so I did. I waited for His voice, for signs, for others to speak. I waited and waited and waited. But I never moved. For the past 7 months, I've been in a pit that looks a lot like a classroom and art studios. I've felt like I had to finish, that I had to stay. But, there was no passion for it, no desire. I would watch my classmates get so excited about design and paper samples and all I could think about was when I could talk to a future intern and answer their questions about Journey or Kenya. The only places I cared to be were at the church or in Kenya. But, I felt like I couldn't move from where I was.

Turns out the only things keeping me in school were the fact that the world says I have to go to school and get a degree and the fear of letting my parents down or disappointing them. But I was reminded that there is no fear in love, because perfect love casts out fear. (1 John 4:18). While my parents and others may WANT the best for me, I fully trust that God KNOWS best for me. So, while I was sitting in school, miserable as ever, just waiting for someone to tell me to move, the Lord was patiently waiting for me to do what He's been teaching me since May - to get up and simply walk.

He wasn't going to pull me out of this one because He knew that with Him by my side, I could walk out. He knew I could walk out of the light that culture was shining into my pit. He knew I could walk through the door of fear that was keeping me in. He knew that I could boldly walk out of what the world has for me and into what He has for me because He has equipped me, He is with me, and He is for me. When you realize that you don't belong to the world, but rather to the King - now that is an unstoppable force.

There is an overwhelming confidence that comes with walking in the steps of my Savior. There is a boldness in my steps because I know who goes before me. I also know who stands behind me. With God on my side, the world doesn't stand a chance. I may be called to be in this world, but I am not called to be of it.

So now I walk...

Kimbilio - A Home For Babies!

As most of you know, I spent this summer in Kenya as a Journey 

intern with Choose to Invest. Today, they announced the opening 

of their new orphanage and baby home, Kimbilio. I am so honored, 

proud, and excited that God would allow me to be a small part 

of this. You can be a part of it too! Read below to find out how. 

"Choose to Invest is a global discipleship movement for the 

next generation. Their mission is to awaken, disciple, and 

empower the next generation to know Jesus and make Him known. 

Kimbilio is one of three projects Choose to Invest has. 

Kimbilio is a refuge for orphaned and abandoned children in 

Kenya, Africa. Kimbilio is swahili, one of Kenya’s official 

languages, for refuge." 

"Choose to Invest made a big announcement about what is 

next for Kimbilio Project. In an attempt to provide a 

refuge for children they are starting a home for abandoned

babies in Kenya. Many children, specifically babies, are 

abandoned in hospitals by their mothers, left on the side 

of the street, in pit latrines (restrooms), or in garbage 

dumps. The Kimbilio Baby Home will allow Choose to Invest 

to start caring for these children who in the eyes of many 

have no hope and love. They will also be able to learn 

about their model, care, staffing, medical needs, budgets, 

volunteers, and much more. The Kimbilio Baby Home will set 

the course of the future for Kimbilio Project.

To read the announcement

 click here: http://www.investthoughts.org/?p=1827 

and to learn more about Kimbilio 

click here: www.choosetoinvest.org/kimbilio "

Unfortunately stories like Moses' are not uncommon! 

We have the ability to change the outcome of

these precious babies lives!

I'm asking each of you to consider helping Kimbilio provide a refuge for babies just like Moses. There are multiple ways you can do this! 

• You can be a sponsor family for children who will live in the baby home for just $45 a month! Find out how here http://www.choosetoinvest.org/#/kimbilio/sponsorship 

• You can help by donating to the rent cost of the home in Nairobi!

• You can help purchase things for the babies like cribs, beds, appliances, etc!

• You can be an advocate for a child at the home by helping us to find sponsor families for them! 

• You can host a baby shower or purchase something off of Kimbilio's registry! 

• To find out how to do all of these things click here! http://www.choosetoinvest.org/#/kimbilio/needs