All the Way

"All the way my Savior leads me."

We just arrived back from community one and the Lord's faithfulness abounds. I knew that God had me on a different journey than last summer, but I wasn't aware of just how different it would look. It has been a beautiful challenge walking with these ladies as their leader but also walking along side of them as a part of journey.

While in the community, I was able to see God - once again - in a way I've never seen him before. As a lot of you know, I'm a creative person. I enjoy art and the creative process, but I also am an avid lover of photography. When it comes to taking my own photos, I'm am very insecure and struggle with feeling inadequate. But, during the 6 days in the community, the Lord pressed in to me that I am not made perfect in the things I do - but in the way He has made me.

For the first few days of Journey, I was hesitant to even take out my camera because as part of our staff, we have an amazing photographer, Johnny McLaughlin, who God has blessed with an incredible talent. But, God has been faithful to use Johnny in a huge way in my life. He has had the patience to sit down with me and teach me so many things about photography and just reassure me that it is ok to mess up. For so long I was feeling guilty because my dad bought me all this new camera stuff specifically for Kenya and I didn't even want to use it. But, through Johnny and Kadie, God showed me that just like He blesses me because I'm His child, so does my earthly father. He didn't buy me these things because he expects perfection, but because he wants me to experience joy and because he loves me. The same way, God doesn't bless me with things because He expects perfection, but because He loves me and wants me to have joy.



All throughout the week I was able to see what it truly means to be a leader. As a summer staff, we have been extremely blessed with Cody as our leader. I've been able to watch him and learn from him as he pushes us to step further into our roles. Today, Cody left with Nathanael to do some work and summer staff was left to lead on our own. I was honestly really nervous to not have him here but as the day winds down, I am so thankful that we have had this opportunity. Before leaving, he looked us in the eyes and said he trusts us and is confident in Jesus in us to lead these interns. Today was such a sweet time with the interns as they had a sabbath and as we were able to lead them in a debrief discussion of what they experienced in the first community. The Lord showed me continually that He truly has equipped me for what He has called me to. I was able to step up and into the role that has been given to me for the summer and I am confident that I will continue to grow from here.

His goodness is steadfast and everlasting. It endures forever and I can't even imagine what is in store for me during the rest of the summer and when I return home. As I walk along side of these interns I am reminded daily that I am on a journey as well. I see Jesus in all of them on a daily basis and am so thankful that the Lord purposed all of us to be together for this summer. It is such a sweet time that not a lot of people get to have in their lives.

This past week was a beautiful reminder of just how big God is. As I stepped off the bus, I was greeted by dear friends who were not aware that I was returning. Their excitement and joy was a direct reflection of God's excitement and joy when we choose to return to Him daily. I am so thankful that He has allowed me to come back for this summer and strengthen not only my relationship with the people of Kenya, but also my relationship with Him. His love is sweet and so so wild.

Thank you all for your prayers. Please keep them coming as we gear up to head into our next community Tuesday morning.

This is the Day

Today is the day.

We head to the airport in just 7 hours and will be on our way to Kenya. I have waited for this moment since August. I knew I would be returning to Kenya. While I didn't know it what capacity it would be in, I was confident nonetheless. And I am so full of joy that it is with Choose to Invest and the Journey 2013 interns.

This past week at Camp Highland I got to watch the Lord move in so many ways. He is actively setting this group free from things that have held them captive for years. It is a beautiful sight and I am full of anticipation for what He is going to do.

They have started to share their stories with each other and it is humbling and incredible to see how the Lord has knit this team together so intentionally. I cannot wait to walk along side of them as they continue to go deeper with God and with each other over the next 9 weeks.

As I look back to where I was a year ago at this time, all I can see is God's faithfulness. The past two years have been nothing but walking through brokenness. When I arrived in Atlanta for J2013, I felt nothing but peace. I have already wrestled through what it looks like to not be broken. I've learned that I don't have to be broken for God to teach me things. I've learned it's ok to be confident in His calling. I've learned that you can become just as numb to brokenness as you can to seasons of peace.

I am happy to just be with Him; to just walk with Him knowing that He is leading me and will let me know which direction to head in. I'm excited to walk the streets of Kenya once again. I'm filled with joy to be with these beautiful people. And I'm fully expectant of all that He has planned for this team.

Whatever comes our way, to God be the glory. Forever and ever. Amen.

A Time to Remember

A year ago today, I was curled up in a ball laying on my bed crying. I had just broken up with someone and I was so angry at my dad. I was 4 days away from beginning one of the greatest journeys of my life and all I could think about was how I couldn't wait to get away from everything.

It has been exactly one year since I've been in a relationship and I can honestly say it has been the best year out of the 23 I've been blessed with. It has been a year of growth, a year of struggles, a year of brokenness and healing. I saw God in a way that I never had before. I had always said I didn't need a man by side, but over the past year I've come to actually believe it and live that out. Starting with Journey, I saw the Lord place a shield around my (at the time) broken heart. He allowed me to see what it mean to let Him guard my heart, and then He taught me how to guard it myself. He brought me 11 men as a part of my team and allowed me to witness what it means to have a true brother in Christ. A brother who is interested in your walk with Christ and not just when he can take you on a date. I've had guy friends all my life. But I'd never had a guy friend that treated me the way Christ calls us to treat each other - as sons and daughters of the most high God.

I was able to watch one member of my team pursue his girlfriend, now fiance, in the way he handled his relationships with all the girls. It was a beautiful and tangible example of what I deserve and of how Christ constantly pursues me. I was allowed to let go, to truly live, to love again the way I was created to love. Christ set me back on my feet and simply said, "walk." So I did.

This past year I have walked in more freedom than I ever knew possible. I've learned so much about Jesus and His love for me. I have learned what it means to rest in His love. I've experienced His correction and His discipline. And, I've been romanced by the one man that deems me worthy of dying for.

This year, God has showed me just how faithful He is in everything that He does. He is a promise maker and a promise keeper. He has called me out of my comfort zone and into a life where I don't know what's next. But, I've never been more ok with that than I am right now.

Tomorrow, I leave again for a place that is more like home than I could've ever dreamed of. I leave with a healed heart; a heart full of hope and promise. I walk forward with confidence that His plans and timing are so sovereign. I march on knowing that my life rests in the palm of His hand and not in mine. For that, I am so thankful.

And Still, I Must Walk

If you know me at all, you know I do things with a passion. I speak with a passion. I write with a passion. I love with a passion. I live with a passion. But sometimes, I can feel that passion fading. I can feel the enemy sneaking in and telling me I'm not good enough or that I have to conform to the world I live in.

Over the past month at church, we were talking about Joseph and the pit he was in. We talked about what he learned while he was there and how God used that time to prepare him for what was coming. Joseph waited for God to pull him out of the pit. The pit was empty and void of water. (Genesis 37:24). Much like Joseph, I've been in my own pit since August. I just didn't recognize it for what it was.

Joseph's pit was a literal hole in the ground while mine was something different: school. Something inside of me has been telling me this isn't where I'm supposed to be anymore but I was fighting it. School has been hell for me and I haven't been able to live a full life confined within the walls that are holding me in. I've been waiting for the Lord, like Joseph, to just pull me out. But He had other plans in mind.

This summer, we had to pick one word that we thought God was teaching us. At first I thought my word was "wait", but I soon realized it was actually "walk". We walked all over the beautiful country of Kenya and I grew to prefer that over the bus rides. God constantly whispered in my ear that all He was asking me to do was walk with Him. He asked me in Kenya, and He's asked me again - while I was in my pit.

Like this summer, I thought He was asking me to wait - and so I did. I waited for His voice, for signs, for others to speak. I waited and waited and waited. But I never moved. For the past 7 months, I've been in a pit that looks a lot like a classroom and art studios. I've felt like I had to finish, that I had to stay. But, there was no passion for it, no desire. I would watch my classmates get so excited about design and paper samples and all I could think about was when I could talk to a future intern and answer their questions about Journey or Kenya. The only places I cared to be were at the church or in Kenya. But, I felt like I couldn't move from where I was.

Turns out the only things keeping me in school were the fact that the world says I have to go to school and get a degree and the fear of letting my parents down or disappointing them. But I was reminded that there is no fear in love, because perfect love casts out fear. (1 John 4:18). While my parents and others may WANT the best for me, I fully trust that God KNOWS best for me. So, while I was sitting in school, miserable as ever, just waiting for someone to tell me to move, the Lord was patiently waiting for me to do what He's been teaching me since May - to get up and simply walk.

He wasn't going to pull me out of this one because He knew that with Him by my side, I could walk out. He knew I could walk out of the light that culture was shining into my pit. He knew I could walk through the door of fear that was keeping me in. He knew that I could boldly walk out of what the world has for me and into what He has for me because He has equipped me, He is with me, and He is for me. When you realize that you don't belong to the world, but rather to the King - now that is an unstoppable force.

There is an overwhelming confidence that comes with walking in the steps of my Savior. There is a boldness in my steps because I know who goes before me. I also know who stands behind me. With God on my side, the world doesn't stand a chance. I may be called to be in this world, but I am not called to be of it.

So now I walk...

Kimbilio - A Home For Babies!

As most of you know, I spent this summer in Kenya as a Journey 

intern with Choose to Invest. Today, they announced the opening 

of their new orphanage and baby home, Kimbilio. I am so honored, 

proud, and excited that God would allow me to be a small part 

of this. You can be a part of it too! Read below to find out how. 

"Choose to Invest is a global discipleship movement for the 

next generation. Their mission is to awaken, disciple, and 

empower the next generation to know Jesus and make Him known. 

Kimbilio is one of three projects Choose to Invest has. 

Kimbilio is a refuge for orphaned and abandoned children in 

Kenya, Africa. Kimbilio is swahili, one of Kenya’s official 

languages, for refuge." 

"Choose to Invest made a big announcement about what is 

next for Kimbilio Project. In an attempt to provide a 

refuge for children they are starting a home for abandoned

babies in Kenya. Many children, specifically babies, are 

abandoned in hospitals by their mothers, left on the side 

of the street, in pit latrines (restrooms), or in garbage 

dumps. The Kimbilio Baby Home will allow Choose to Invest 

to start caring for these children who in the eyes of many 

have no hope and love. They will also be able to learn 

about their model, care, staffing, medical needs, budgets, 

volunteers, and much more. The Kimbilio Baby Home will set 

the course of the future for Kimbilio Project.

To read the announcement

 click here: http://www.investthoughts.org/?p=1827 

and to learn more about Kimbilio 

click here: www.choosetoinvest.org/kimbilio "

Unfortunately stories like Moses' are not uncommon! 

We have the ability to change the outcome of

these precious babies lives!

I'm asking each of you to consider helping Kimbilio provide a refuge for babies just like Moses. There are multiple ways you can do this! 

• You can be a sponsor family for children who will live in the baby home for just $45 a month! Find out how here http://www.choosetoinvest.org/#/kimbilio/sponsorship 

• You can help by donating to the rent cost of the home in Nairobi!

• You can help purchase things for the babies like cribs, beds, appliances, etc!

• You can be an advocate for a child at the home by helping us to find sponsor families for them! 

• You can host a baby shower or purchase something off of Kimbilio's registry! 

• To find out how to do all of these things click here! http://www.choosetoinvest.org/#/kimbilio/needs

Baking of Bread: A Mom's Humbling Sacrifice

"For children are not obligated to save up for their parents, but parents for their children. I will most gladly spend and be spent for your souls." - 2 Corinthians 12:14-15

Ever since I can remember, my parents have gone above and beyond to provide for my brother and I. We've never gone hungry or unclothed. We've never had to live on the streets or move in with friends. We've had numerous family trips and vacations. We've both been able to go to college. And, I've been able to go to Kenya. The Summer of 2013 will be for the third time. It is easy to look at my life and see that I've been greatly blessed with a fantastic family and parents that go out of their way to make sure I have what I need and most of what I want. (Still working on the F250;) )

Today, I was reminded just how much they do sacrifice for me, even at almost 23 years old. Still being in school, I don't have a lot of time to work which means I don't have the means to pay for a lot right now. More days than not, I walk around feeling guilty about it. But, today I was reminded that that's what God gave me parents for - to provide for me. Now, one day I will not rely on my parents anymore for my daily living, but for now that's the circumstances I've been given. I truly believe the Lord is using it to keep me humble and to remind me that I can't do anything on my own. Even when I won't rely on my parents anymore, I will still have to rely on Him - for even more than I rely on my parents now.

This morning, my mom sent me an email that she also sent out to her friends and co-workers. This is what it said:

Dear Friends and Supporters!!
My daughter, Abi, has applied and been accepted to go back to Kenya next summer with Choose to Invest.  She will go as staff this time.  This is truly where God is leading and using her.  All my bread proceeds for this year will again go to Kenya!  Just when I thought I would get ahead on some things, God seems to have other ideas.  I am so thankful He has given me this outlet in order to serve Him.

As many times as I've thought about people serving the body of Christ, I seem to forget that I am part of that body. My mom has sacrificed so much over the years for my brother and I. I can't even pretend to know all the things she's wanted to do but hasn't done so that we could do what we wanted. This is just another example of that. My mom's bread baking is her thing - something she loves doing for our family as well as others. And, yet again, she is using it to help me get to where I'm meant to be. I'm speechless as I read over this email again and again. I may be called to reach people 9,000 miles away, but my mom is reaching someone under her own roof. (Which is JUST as important and necessary might I add.) I am so humbled and thankful for the things my mom has done and is currently doing to help get me to where God has called me. I'm a part of my family for a reason and God knew long before I was created that I would need them to help me with all the things that have been placed on my heart - and He's blessed them with the means to do it. He blesses us so that we may bless others.


I am completely humbled this morning by witnessing my mom selflessly serving our God and me as I prepare for the next steps of my journey. I pray that we both continue to lean into Him and trust in His holy and perfect way. I pray we always enjoy the journey.

Rejoice Project

This is just a glimpse of what I had the opportunity to do this summer. I am still so humbled, honored, excited, and thankful for all that the Lord taught me and is continuing to teach me through my J2012 team and the people that I met in Kenya.

Journey Reflections

-Day 17 Reflection - 4 June 2012 - Monday - Ngaamba

Teaching for the first time.

Denali Primary School: 1st of the Summer.

"Beautiful. Today was absolutely beautiful. God is so alive and moving in this place. We got to walk to first school and it was the most beautiful walk. We got to talk to some of the 252 team. For part of the way we drove and Kristin asked us to sing some songs and pray. It was such a cool thing to experience with part of my team. When we got to the school, all the parents greeted us with hugs and smiles. We helped them gather stones to build the new school. It will take two years to complete it. I worked with a woman named Victoria. She has 3 kids. I met one of them, Kevin. These people work harder than anyone I've ever met before. I felt so convicted of being lazy back home. They never complain or stop to rest and they do everything with a smile on their face.

Jon Fox teaching kids through Rejoice Project.

My God is so so good. So beautiful and so intentional. The kids at the school don't have many visitors so they went a little crazy when we got there. We split up into smaller teams and got to teach 4 classes. Class 7 and 8 were two of the ones in our room and it was the first time I got to talk about something outside of the curriculum. Rachel asked them if they knew that God knows how many hairs are on their head. most of them seemed really surprised and said no. So I got to tell them that God's thoughts about them were more than the grains of sand and that wanted to talk to them. It was such a divine moment and completely orchestrated by God.

Kids at Kiu Primary playing.

After the lesson we got to play with the kids. They are starving for attention. When we left, I was walking when I felt two little hands grab me - Umbua and Thimba. We walked together until they had to turn to go home. I found myself walking in the middle of the road where there are ditches. I held their hands so they could walk up on the solid ground. I heard God whisper to me, "That's what I do with you." He constantly walks with us and allows us to stand on Him so we're not walking in the ditches but on solid ground. It was such a good day.

Our view at the top of the mountain outside of Kiu Primary. 

On the bus ride home, we all sang as loud as we could. I love worshipping my God with our team. He has blessed us so much and I know that there are only greater things to come."








Looking back at this journal entry, I can remember feeling so frustrated that day with how teaching went. I can remember getting back to the campsite feeling defeated because nothing went the way we planned. But, it was in the moment of feeling frustrated that God so lovingly - but firmly - assured me that things will never go well if I only rely on my own abilities. It was that day that I really understood that I have to rely on Him for His strength and not my own. I could've fought all summer, like I did that day, to make things go my way. But, I decided in my tent that night to hand my plans over to Him. Had I not, my summer would've been completely different. I'm so thankful that the Lord allowed me to feel as if I failed that day so that I would realize just how little I can accomplish without him. If I couldn't even carry a bag of rocks up a hill, how would I ever carry the weight of my own problems? That's the beauty of my Savior. He carries them for me and asks me to just keep walking.

Beauty in the Valley

My team this summer was heading to Kwambekenya when we stopped at The Great Rift Valley to look at some shops. I was standing on the lookout and I could not get over how absolutely stunning the valley was. It wasn't until two nights later when the Lord spoke me and told me that my own personal valley was just as stunning. Since that night, I've taken those words and applied them to every day of my life and the changes within my heart are inexplainable. Now, I'd love to be able to say that I'm never sad or frustrated or upset anymore but, that's not the kind of change I'm talking about. The valley is still frustrating. It's still upsetting at times. But, when I pause to reflect on why I'm in the valley, I find that it brings me an immense amount of joy.

We so often hear people talk about being "on the mountain top" or "in the valley" in regards to where they are in their walk with Jesus. More times than not, people would rather be on the mountain top as opposed to in the valley. I was one of those people before this summer. But, I've come to prefer being in the valley.

You see, while the mountain top is great, the valley is where you flourish, where you learn to struggle and overcome; where you learn to keep fighting. The view from the top may be spectacular, but if you stop and think about what you're looking at when you're up there, you'll realize that it's either the valley you just came out of, or the one you're about to head in to. From the top, the valley looks beautiful. So why isn't it that way while we're in it? If we can learn to change our perspective on where we currently are, our view of why we're there will drastically change.

In Ezekiel 3 God asks Ezekiel to GO into the valley so that He may speak to him. The Lord says to him, "Arise, go out into the valley, and there I will speak with you." (Ez 3:22). God asked Ezekiel to LEAVE the comfort of where he was and enter the valley where there was no one else but God. When I read this it spoke so strongly to me and was so encouraging to me to keep walking through my valley. So many times we feel as if Jesus has left us in the middle of the valley to find our own way out. But that is so far from true. He enters the valley WITH us! He walks with us - step for step. He leads us when we don't know the way. He pushes us to take that next step. He NEVER leaves us.

I just want to encourage you to really pray about why you're in the valley and to pray for God to change your perspective on being there. So many times I think to myself that everything would be so much easier if I could just get to the mountain top. But, I get there and find that I'm longing to be back in the valley. The valley is challenging. It shapes me and molds me. It's where I am reminded that I can't do it on my own. When you begin to see the beauty that your valley contains, you'll begin to see the beauty and goodness in every situation you find yourself in. You'll begin to see the purpose in every single thing that you face.

I used to be jealous of people who were on the mountain top. But, I've learned to celebrate with them while they're there; to encourage them and walk beside them while in the valley. Every moment has a purpose, you just have to be willing to appreciate where you are so that your eyes and heart may be opened to it.

Your valley is meaningful.
Your valley is full of life.
Your valley is important.
Your valley is YOURS.
Your valley is purposed and planned.
Your valley is beautiful.

Have faith and take a step.

Purpose

"I long for that sunset and that star-filled sky. My soul aches for that vast, open sky and endless horizon, uninterrupted by buildings or traffic. My heart yearns for the laughter and beautiful voices of hundreds of lovely children singing to us. I'm jealous for that pure joy, that radiating happiness regardless of temporary circumstances. It was there that I felt the true presence of God. It was then that I truly fell in love for the first time - with my Savior and all that He is, and a girl named Rebecca. It was in the middle of a field, walking on a well worn path to a village, that I finally felt the freedom God so often speaks of. It was at a school where I learned the meaning of slowing down, not worrying, and taking time to invest in the people God has placed in your life. It was in a tent on a Sunday that I witnessed true worship. It was in a hut built by a woman named Anna that I received healing and confirmation from God. It was at 5 a.m. when I stood across from Mt. Kenya and watched the sun rise. In all its glory, it was then that I witnessed creation worshiping its creator. It was on a street with no name, and in the hands of a community that I left my heart. It was on an airplane that I left my fear behind and learned to embrace the journey."

I wrote this after returning from Kenya the first time. And it's been mind blowing to look back and see the things God has allowed me to fall completely in love with. And, I know, at the root of it all, is Him. At the base, at the bottom, at the foundation of everything in my life, sits my Almighty Father on His holy and righteous throne. It is because of His grace, love, passion and relentless pursuit of my heart and life that I am able to know and understand where He has me and where He is taking me. I can't tell you the number of visions that dance through my head that I know are completely from the Lord and that I know He will bring to fruition one day. It is with boldness and confidence and pure JOY that I can say I'm thankful for the desert He has me in right now. I've never been more miserable in school in my life. But I've never been more satisfied in my Savior. I was made in the image of the Creator, the image of Christ, the image of my Father. Jesus went to the desert before He began His 33 year long ministry. So, why wouldn't Jesus ask me to do the same.

I've learned in the past few weeks that God will test you. He will push you. Because He alone knows what you're capable of. He knows when you're going to persevere and when you're going to crash and burn. He knew I would want to quit (and still do some days.) But, He also knew I would seek Him and listen to His spirit. He knew I would keep going and come out stronger than before. And, I truly believe that this is what the next three years are for - strengthening me so that I am prepared to leave here and go to where I've been called. He knows my heart longs for that day. But He keeps me focused while I'm here. He knows. He knows it ALL.

If you've ever read Kisses From Katie, you might remember the part where she talks about Pslam 37:4 which says, "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." She talks about how she changed her perspective on that verse and when she did, her life began to change. She began to ask God to make HIS desires HER desires and He began to open so many doors. The same is true for me. I began doing the same thing and rather than just praying for God to send me to Kenya, I began to ask Him to send me on His time and to close that door if it wasn't something He had planned for me. Well, He opened doors and opened them ALL the way! He has faithfully sent me to Kenya twice and is sending me back a third time. I can confidently say that I know I'm meant to be in Kenya. I can also confidently say that my purpose in this moment is to finish school before I go. I have learned so much since I first went to Kenya May 19, 2011. And I know that my journey is far from over.

I long for the people of Ngaamba that became more than faces with names, but dear friends. My soul aches for the precious voices of 21 other interns praising our Savior late into the night. My heart yearns for the greetings of the 252 team and the smiling faces of children dropping in to say hello. I'm no longer jealous for their joy, because I have been awakened to where it lies. It was this summer that I learned what a true brother in Christ looks like. It was 21 other people that showed me what true community is. It was 3 fearless leaders that displayed true leadership. It was in a living room in Nairobi where I discovered what God really thinks about me. It was in Segera where I saw the faithfulness of God and the true power of prayer. It was in Ngaamba where I saw the fruit of bold conversations. It was there that I knew God heard me and saw Him wink at me. It was at an orphanage in Nairobi where I experienced how God fights for me. It was in the scruffy voice of a boy named Melvin that I heard my Savior's gentle whispers. It was while painting canvases with hand and footprints that He told me I'd be back. It was in the bedroom of Narnia that I was able to laugh at past situations and claim victory over them. It was in the actions of my teammates that I learned what respect and pursuit looks like. It was in the lives of others that I got to witness victory through Christ. It was on top of a mountain that I realized I can't give up. It was over the course of ten weeks that I lived and loved, laughed and cried, grew stronger and broke down, let go and overcame. And that was only the beginning...

Here.

"There's no place I'd rather be than here in Your love." 

I sang this all summer with 21 other interns and I can finally say that it's true. I was looking through my Kenya pictures and realized that so many times in life, I've wanted to be in someone else's shoes. I've wished I had their joy or their situation. But by doing so, I completely disregarded my own circumstances. By wishing to be somewhere else, I said to God that my plans and desires for my life were superior to His. And, that my friends, is simply not the case - for anyone.

You see, God hand crafted me (and you too!) And, in doing so, He hand crafted my circumstances. He chose which paths I would walk down and where He would send me. He chose Journey for me. He chose 7 years of school for me instead of 4. He chose and crafted my community. If my God hand picked the people I do life with and the places I do life in, WHY would I ever wish to step into the life He's chosen for someone else?! So many times in life I've wanted what others have, only to miss what GOD has for me. While we sit and desire to be where someone else is, others sit and desire to be where we are. When we fail to see that where God has us, right now, in this moment, is holy and perfect, we fail to see who He really is. We completely miss His sovereignty and His love for us.

This summer we had to pick a word. At first my word was 'waiting'. But, it then changed to 'walk'. We walked ALL over Kenya and one day He spoke to me so clearly. My friend Johannes told me to walk along this skinny ridge alongside a dried up river. If I had fallen, well, I probably wouldn't be writing this. And, I told Johannes that he was crazy for asking me to walk right there. But, my dear friend stopped and said to me, "Yes, but Abi, if you walk on this side of the ridge, your feet will sink in the dirt and you will be stuck." Do you see it? Do you get it? My "A HA!" moment. God has us right where we are FOR A REASON! And that place is the best place for you to be, simply because He placed you there. It might be scary. It might not be where you think you should be. But it's where He wants you and THAT is a beautiful thing.

He chose Kenya for me FOR A REASON!
He chose Anderson for me FOR A REASON!
He chose NewSpring for me FOR A REASON!
He chose singleness for me FOR A REASON!
He chose my family for me FOR A REASON!
He chose my community for me FOR A REASON!

I could go on and on. But I think you get the point. So, now, with confidence I can sing, "There's no place I'd rather be than HERE in Your love!"

HERE is now. In this moment. In this town. In this community. In the midst of His steadfast love. And there's NO place I'd rather be.

The Journey Begins!

I have to wake up in a little over two hours and I absolutely canNOT sleep! I am so full of joy and anticipation for what is about to happen this summer. I am so so so honored that the Lord would use me as His vessel to share His love with the people of this beautiful nation! The word that comes to my mind over and over is humble. I am absolutely humbled by what He is asking me to and now more than ever am I willing to do it in confidence. Not because of anything I can do on my own, but because I know He is with me always. He promises to never leave or forsake me and THAT is powerful.

I keep watching this video over and over. It moves me to the core and I know that God is with me. He is with me in the good times and the bad. He is always here and always good. And, no matter what, He is sovereign and I will praise His name.

Let It Be

When words are fleeting, Jesus speaks. When thoughts are confusing, Jesus calms them. When people are absent, Jesus fills their place.

I am about to embark on what I believe will be a huge landmark in my life. A 70 day adventure with 20 something other college students. To say I have huge expectations for this summer would be an immense understatement. Words cannot scratch the surface of what I feel and know in my heart is about to happen. I don't know what it will all look like, but I do know God is going to move! The beauty of it all is that He has already gone before myself and my entire team and orchestrated every conversation we will have, every event that will happen, every encounter we will make. He has already been there and will be there when it happens.

Ever since going to Kenya last year, I have often wondered why God would choose me to be a part of all this. I don't know what I'm doing AT ALL! But, my God is outside of time and He knew long before the earth was ever formed that tomorrow would be here. He knew that a year ago I would make my first trip to Kenya and absolutely fall in love with the people and the country. He knew that my heart would stay there. He knew that I would long to return. And, He knew that I would go back. The way He has arranged all of this journey up to this day has been absolutely mind blowing and so humbling. He has taught so much through this process and I am so thankful that He never gives up on me! His love never runs out!

One thing I keep going back to is the last day we were in Ereri last year. I was talking to Rebecca and I made her a promise. I told her that I loved her so much and then I promised I would come back to see her. After I got on the bus, it hit me. What if I never get to go back though? Part of me felt guilty but I knew that even if I didn't see her on this earth again, I would see her on the streets of gold and we would sing together again. She has never left my mind or my heart since last year and I prayed every day that she would fall even more in love with Jesus and that I would see her again. As it turns out, this Journey team is the first team to go to the region of Segera - where Rebecca lives. I have no doubt in my mind that this is one of the many reasons I am on this trip. I made a girl a promise and God is allowing me to fulfill it. He is SO good!

I have so many emotions running through me right now. I'm excited to be returning to Kenya and to meet all these new people. I'm stoked to learn even more about the God I serve and call Father. I'm excited that He is allowing me to share His love with others. But, I'm scared. I'm scared to be gone for this long. I'm scared of what might change while I am gone. I'm scared of what the Lord might ask me to do. But, most of al, I am willing. I am willing to be uncomfortable. I am willing to hand over my fears and place them in the hands of my Savior. I am willing to go where ever He may call me. He is in control and THAT excites me! That absolutely pumps me up! Knowing that He has already gone before me and that I can't screw anything up because He has already done the work is so freeing and such a relief!

Lord, I pray that I would just be in your presence during this time. I pray that I would lay aside all of my plans and that yours would be made known. I pray that everything I do would bring glory to Your name alone. This is all for You and because of You. I pray that my team would stand as one and honor You in all of our actions. I pray that our motives would be pure, hearts would be guarded but open to You moving in them. Open our ears God, let us hear what You would say to us. I pray for divine intervention throughout this whole Journey. You are so so good. We are so undeserving. I love you. All of this in Your precious name...

Amen.
Let it be.